Everything is INFLATING...and sagging

My boobs are getting huge, and starting to sag a little, which just makes me sweat a LOT more. It's really really gross. My butt is getting bigger, still. Which is awesome and makes my pants fit so much better.

Thats a lie, by the way, pants are now a 5 minute process once they reach the mountain that is my ass. Oh and its sagging nicely too, pretty sure I can hold a pencil up with it, which is a talent I could prolly win awards for.
My belly is not sagging yet, but it is inflating, and I have only gained 2 pounds so far. I keep having these weird dreams that my belly gets slightly bigger over night and then I don't notice it til I try to put a shirt on that no longer fits.

I don't have anything funny to say to end this post....I'm sorry I failed you.