Just measured my ass

My ass is larger that my belly.
I realize in normal conditions this may be seen as a good thing, but since I am preggy, and my belly seems to be growing everyday, growing bigger than it ever has, my ass should NOT be bigger.

Belly: 36 in
Ass: 40 in

Now I do have to say that my measurements were prolly not exactly on the dot, my tools were earbuds and a plastic ruler, but the fact still remains that somehow my ass has outgrown my belly.
I just can't get over the fact.

Maybe my ass is going to have a child.

My skirts hurt now

The elastic that holds up my pretty skirts, and also hides my pregnant, but doesn't look pregnant, just looks like fat, belly now hurts my sides. Its to the point that I consider the looks I would get if I just took off my skirt in public places. Everyone has seen a barely dressed woman before right? This is America.

AND I just had a dietian tell me that I have a nutritional problem...Slow Weight Gain.

Slow weight gain my ass, no really MY ASS! They should have just looked at it, its huge! Its like someone, a sneaky someone, stuck balloons in my ass and they inflate a little more everyday. Which is why the beautiful elastic in my skirts and soft shorts no longer are helpful, just painful, and irritating, and possibly a future cause of public nudity.